Yes, I have joined the ranks of internet bloggers around the world. What can I say, a woman's gotta do what a woman's gotta do! I do hope you enjoy this, I think I will have fun! First and foremost I want to be sure you know about upcoming appearances! This Wednesday I can be heard on "Breaking the Conspiracy of Silence" a vital internet radio show with Kathleen Brooks, PhD. I will be talking with Kathleen about my book as well as life and future books, yup they are in the works! Check in from time to time. Share with me and others. In the meantime - Blessings and NAMASTE!
Fear creeps in when you are never expecting it, have you noticed? Things are going along grand, and all of a sudden - worry, anxiety, FEAR have entered the picture. It is moments like that (like this morning, when suddenly I was face to face with fear again) that I first have to turn to God. Remembering God is my source of all and that all things are good, even if they do not appear that way. I also weave into the memory banks the remember that "fear" is simply "False Evidence Appearing Real" (Get it?) F-E-A-R. Thought ya did. Fear is not the truth. It was different when we were children and feared our abusers. That is not what I am talking about here. I am talking about allowing ourselves to believe in something other then the total good. Day to Day lesson for me, I know that! And today's early morning "fear attack" - just another day to practice prayer and thanksgiving! Blessings and Namaste
OK so it's a little warm around here. 95 today.. yuk, yet I would not want anything bellow 40! Today is the day folks! Be sure to tune in this afternoon to Kathleen Brooks show Breaking the Conspiracy of Silence. Thank God someone is! I have the honor of being Kathleen's guest this afternoon and have to admit, I am a wee bit nervous. My interview on Planetary Spirit (Which is archived on their site mine) was only a little nerve wracking... The hosts are known to me, so I was a little more at ease. While the site reports that my appearance on Global Internet Talk show is TBA, I have received word it will most likely be this Friday between 12-1pm EST. Kinda short notice to get my incredably wonderful and talented Web Master to change the info.. Such is the wonderful use of this "Blog".. what a weird name.. who thought of that anyway? Both today Show and Friday will be archived on the sites. so if you miss um, you can get them anytime! ON a "personal" note want to use this space to thank my Neighbor Rich, ppublically. He did not hesitate to help with a new and unbelievably heavy air conditioner last night.. Making 95 much easier to deal with today! Thank YOU Rich... You ROCK! In the meantime... Blessings and NAMASTE!
BIG Thank you to Kathleen Brooks for a great show today! Thank you for giving survivors a voice and vehicle to healing!! Blessings Kathleen in all your work! In the meantime... Blessings and Namaste
Stay tuned all!! I will be letting you know when the Global Talk Radio show will be aired, and later archived on the site. Had a great interview today and am told it will go up some time at the end of next week. Happy Birthday today to my youngest! Major Party tomorrow as we celebrate him and his brother whos birthday is next week! Busy times!! Too much cake! WE talk about my birthday (its in-between the boys') Shhh.. age is just a bunch of numbers right? It has taken so long to grow up it seems and yet, I still feel I need to be a child. Wonder why! The important thing is that this is a brand new day! In fact today is the day The Lord has made - lets rejoice and be glad in it! And in the meantime - Blessings and Namaste
Blessings.. I am always awed at the way God works! Feeling slightly down about yet another birthday I went with my children to a local restraunt. My kids were funny as the announced to anyone and everyone that it was my birthday (My youngest deciding to add the number of years I have existed on this planet!) As we finished our meal and the kid insisted we have dessert so the wait-staff could sing to me, our waitress leaned over. "I have to tell you something" she said. " The couple that was in back of you... well the woman handed me a twenty dollar bill on the way out and asked that it go toward your bill! She said Happy Birthday." I turned to see where they had been as she added "They are gone now." Thank you unknown person.. thank you God for bringing these gifts of Love my way on my Birthday. It is not the first time someone has "Payed it forward" for me. Once in line at a coffee/donut drive up I arrived at the window only to discover the woman in front of me had payed for my order. The staff at the window said " She said it was because you had been so nice and let her pull in front of you." This is what Loving others is about. Yes, I have done this too.. randomly paying for the person in back of me.. I have a dear friend who routinely pays a highway toll for the person in back of him. It is simply about Random acts of Kindnees... Have you ever done this? In the Meantime.. Blessings and Namaste
My latest interview is up on GlobalTalkRadio!!! It will air in our live stream on Thursday, July 5th at 11am ET (8am PT) and again at random times in the future. More importantly, the show can be streamed or downloaded on-demand 24/7 at:
http://www.globaltalkradio.com/shows/astorytotell Be sure to check it out!!!
So here we are.. it is the seventh day in the seventh month of the seventh year of this millennium. 07/07/07.. feeling they urge to play those numbers?! I woke thinking about what luck really is. Dreams I had last night seemed to have something of "luck" attached to them... one was of escape and victory from forces that would harm while the other was a comparing and contrasting of material belongings with one I happen to know with a great deal more. I could not tell if in that dream I actually was longing for more or just taking a look at it. In this now moment I can say, while it is nice they have all those wonderful things, what I have is enough! But is it luck? Or is it choice? Is it the longest straw or the longest held thought in mind. What do you believe you deserve? It is one I have struggled with for so long. One of my mother's favorite words of control was about how "deserved" the bad things that happened, but about how deserved nothing else. I still have to remind myself that is NOT my truth. I don't think there is such a thing as luck, I think it is about chosing to think differently. To stay in the possitive. Arguing our limitations will only bring more limitations. The universe will respond to whatever your thoughts put out. If thoughts of "I can't" I don't deserve" and "I don't have.." fill your mind, the unverse will respond to that. Its about choice.. not about luck. SEVEN however, is a highly spiritual number. Its about completion. The story of the creation involves six day of work and a seventh to celebrate with rest the completion of the work. (Isn't it also interesting that 7/7/07 just happens to be on the seventh day!!) Seven is considered a holy number.It is the number of manifestation (back to "thoughts held in mind produce after their kind" - unity principle.) In a sense it represence totatality and some suggest perfection. The number seven more importantly is about completion. Perhaps on this seventh day of the week, on this seventh day of the seventh month in this seventh year we should take time in prayer to release to the universe all that no longer serves us.. and open to the gifts of Spirit. In the meantime .. Blessings and Namaste (X7!)
Do you trust God? I ask myself daily how much I trust that the Creator of all will and does indeed care for my every need. A concsiousness of prosperity is something I must constantly work at - and that I know is about Trust! However, when I do turn my attention to the knowing that God provides for all.. that which is outpictured in my life is amazing. Recently several things happened with in a short time period which confirmed my inner knowing that God takes care of me. I was driving into a local breakfast drive thru to get my morning Java and something to eat at the very same time as another car. I stopped and let the woman go. As I arrived at the window.. money in hand I was told to keep it.. the woman I had let go in front of me, had paid for my breakfast as a thank you!! Then a week ago on my birthday my children and I ventured out to a local restraunt. My kids of course announcing to anyone and everyone that it was my birthday - my youngest adding the numerical age I had achieved! (oy) At the end of the meal as we were about to order the insisted upon dessert (so the crew could sing their song) the waitress leaned over and said: "I have to tell you something.. There was a couple sitting in back of you.." I immediatly thought.. ot oh, the kids were too loud and they complained.. however she went on "The woman handed me 20 dollars as they were on their way out the door and said to put toward your bill and say 'Happy Birthday." - wow - if that was not all enough I woke a few days ago, with that "financial fear" I sometimes go into. I was not pleased with my negative thinking and simply told God.. " I expect unexpected income today. I expect some sort of check in the mail." As I arrived home and checked the mail there was a check from my car insurance company for overpayment~! I can only say.. God is Good... ALL THE TIME In the meantime - Blessings and Namaste
Going to Spirit for healing is as easy as closing your eyes, dropping consciously from your head to heart and KNOWING that you are One with the Creator of All... that you are an extention of the Divine Mind. It is about knowing that in the realm of pure potential, anything and everything is possible. It is about remembering that our Higher Self is whole and perfect, it has to be as we are created in the image and after the likeness of the Perfect Universal Consciousness - God. We are God's beloved Children in whom It is well pleased. There can be nothing but wholeness and perfection in that. Healing is about the recognition of all of that.. and more... Yea easier said then done! In the Meantime.. Blessings and Namaste
Ok we are off! Might be able to log on and let ya know who the vacation is going but then again.. who knows. we may be having like wayyyy tooo much fun. So the kids and I are off to visit my life long and dear friend - my soul sister.. A cabin in the mountains, some hiking, swimming in clean lakes and a visit across the boarder to Canada! Woo Hoo... Blessings and Namaste all...
So what's a vacation without a little trip to the ER! It was only a short scare as the ER staff proclaimed my fear - my child's leg was "broken".. alas.. the X-ray, Thank you God, showed us otherwise! Badly bruised, yes, but not broken! Having gotten that crisis out of the way at the beginning of the trip we were ready to try to start to enjoy the rest of the trip. My kids had a great time and I had a chance to sit quietly on the porch of my friends Mountainside Log Cabin and observe, up close and personal, God. There, high above the rest of the world one can actually forget that the rest of the world exists. For a moment, you can forget there is a war raging, that hatred looms in city streets, that people and children are starving and dying in remote areas and that this world could be dying because of the way we have disrespected it. There on that mountain, with cleaner than other lakes below, and wild life all around - you can, for a moment, forget. So many times I sat quietly, taking in the panaramic landscape, watching a Hawk circle for prey just, it seemed a short distance above, sitting as still as possible as a humming bird whized up to the hummingbird feeder my friend had hung on her porch - exquisit as it zipped in and away. At night, the same sky that held clouds you could nearly touch displayed more stars than on could dream existed. One night in particular, my friend and I sat discussing it all and I meantioned how I knew at my depths that no matter what, God held us. A few moments later, my gasped and pointed straight ahead. Two clouds were coming together and we could not deny, they appeared as two hands, fingers extended from long narrow arms and hands - I sighed. "See. God is embrassing this world." And in that moment, you could believe, without reservation, that the hand of God was always at work for the greater good. There, on that mountain, I remembered - intending that the moment of renewal would remain with me. And if, for a moment, I am caught up again in this world - I return in mind to the peace of that place - to the side of that mountain, see the hawk, see the hummingbird, see the hands of God encircling this globe.. For a moment... Blessings and Namaste
Been doing a lot of sitting and taking it all in. The problem with doing that is finding that place of simple (or not so simple) acceptance of all as it is - because it is and not going to a place of judgement. Its not so much falling into the trap of calling something good or bad as it falling into a place of fear around something - alas.. fear it continues to seep in when I think I have gotten so much better at resisting it. FEAR- False Evidence Appearing Real. And I must constantly remind myself of that. Standing in Trust that all is well, That God is in charge and all is in Divine Order is without a doubt soo hard. Prayer and Meditation are the only ways I am able to step beyond the fear.. Hold me in your prayers as I walk through it one more time Blessings and Namaste
Ya know.. overall I am consider myself an easy going person..I believe in our Freedom.. I believe in Freedom of speach and people doing whatever they want as long as others are NOT hurt in the process... if others are hurt, then it is no longer acceptable. IT OUTRAGES me that others do not consider the rights others around them. When I started this web site, I opened the forum to all who wanted to post thoughts.. it is pretty clear this site is in existance for those who have been abused - and/or those who worked people who have been abused. When postings started appearting that were only spammers who posted links to drug and porn sites.. I had to take steps to screen those who wanted to post. Now, within the last several days I have received an onslaught of emails.. ALL of which are from PIGS who are sending rude sexual comments and links again to porn.. this time they send it to ME.. It outrages me that there is no consideration for the fact that this is a site dedicated to the healing of sexual abuse.. and yet they are sending links to PORN! My message today is to those people: I have no problem with you doing what you want.. if you are into porn and no one is getting hurt.. feel free.. but DO NOT send your porn to me or others who are not in a place to want or need to receive it. Have respect for others. Have respect for me. Thank you Blessing and Namaste
What if.. someone you love did something that was totally out of character.. something you never dreamed in a life time they would be capable of doing... But we are capable aren't we? Think of the parents of the Virg. Tech murderer. Did they ever once look at their son and believe for a second that he might out 33 lives including his own? For that matter, did he? Do we stand back and say no that didn't happen? It could not have happened because he is simply not capable of that? Well in this case we can not do that, there were too many witnesses. But what about when their are no witnesses? What about when someone crosses a line - for whatever reason; a psychotic episode, a burst of anger, too much alcohol and/or drugs, a "flash back" of their own - do we dismiss the one injured as a nut case making up lies simply because it is not our experience with that particular person they say has done something horrific? Do we say - "You lie" because we do not think it possible for the incident to have occured? It becomes harder when it is a member of our own family - the wife who discovers her husband has committed a horrible crime.. or a child who discovers their parent has acted in ways they never imagined possible. - Do we dismiss the accuser simply because it is not in our realm of possiblities that they may speak the truth? What if.. What if it IS their truth? When hearing it is too painful we easily dismiss it all as lies. Perhaps that is too is ok.
MOVE is a four letter word for a reason! OY! The last several weeks I have been focused on relocating my family. Though overwhelmed with the challenge of packing three kids, three cats and a puppy - and nearly everything we owned, I decided to approach it systematicly. I was determined to be more organized, clearly Lable boxes and where they would go in our new home and keep only those things we really needed or clearly had a sentimental value.. ugh.. I packed, I purged, tossed, I gave, I cleaned and coughed (dust ya know) I bubble wrapped, I taped boxes, I labeled, I stacked.. and as the move date drew closer I would often stand back, still overwhelmed by what was left to do! Then the moving company from hell arrived two hours late, and the saga ended with me hiring a different company for the next day.. alas we would not arrive at our new destination on the date we had hoped to, but we would be in time for the children to start at their new schools as scheduled. And so here I sit... Boxes.. still piled around me! (computer MUST be the first thing unpacked!) We are in our new home and LOVING it.. However as with every other time I have done this before - I swear.. I WILL NEVER MOVE AGAIN! In the meantime.. Blessings and Namaste!
Happy Holidays Dear Ones! There is no specific reason I have neglected to write other than the move, settling into our new home and new surroundings, getting the children settled into their new schools and the not so small task of UNpacking! Then suddenly the holiday maddness is was upon me! Not any good reasons, but reasons non the less. We are settled now, I believe. My children are of course excited about Christmas (askig daily to just open presents now!) I have taken time to reflect on all that has been given to me. I am blessed to have been able to thus far manage the task of parenting fatherless children though at times this single parenting job is overwhelming. It is overwhelming on so many levels, Financially and emotionally. They grieve their fathers death daily and each in her/his own unique way. Each must be met where they are and that is not always easy. The move has shifted some of this, but never will it be "all better." While I am grateful for this I do grieve myself. Standing in one's truth can be a lonely and sometimes frightening experience. Hands extended out to replace the one's that have been removed are welcomed supports, but there is always a small void left when support is withdrawn. The sharp realization that someone is no more is that much more difficult when they have not left this planet. And so we begin a new, create new hopes, dreams, traditions and family. I wish you each blessings of peace, hope, Love and Joy this Holiday Season. I wish you deep and Light-filled Healing. I wish the ability to embrace the world in Love and recognize the Christ essence in each and every person you meet. And in the meantime... Blessings and Namaste
I have to pass on a cool new site you should check out. It was perhaps one of the safest and easiest ways to meet people on the Net! http://www.crushorflush.com is perfect for meeting new folks! I highly recommend ya give it a try! Many Blessings Christine
18 comments:
Yes, I have joined the ranks of internet bloggers around the world. What can I say, a woman's gotta do what a woman's gotta do! I do hope you enjoy this, I think I will have fun!
First and foremost I want to be sure you know about upcoming appearances! This Wednesday I can be heard on "Breaking the Conspiracy of Silence" a vital internet radio show with Kathleen Brooks, PhD. I will be talking with Kathleen about my book as well as life and future books, yup they are in the works!
Check in from time to time. Share with me and others.
In the meantime - Blessings and NAMASTE!
Fear creeps in when you are never expecting it, have you noticed? Things are going along grand, and all of a sudden - worry, anxiety, FEAR have entered the picture. It is moments like that (like this morning, when suddenly I was face to face with fear again) that I first have to turn to God. Remembering God is my source of all and that all things are good, even if they do not appear that way. I also weave into the memory banks the remember that "fear" is simply "False Evidence Appearing Real" (Get it?) F-E-A-R. Thought ya did. Fear is not the truth.
It was different when we were children and feared our abusers. That is not what I am talking about here. I am talking about allowing ourselves to believe in something other then the total good. Day to Day lesson for me, I know that! And today's early morning "fear attack" - just another day to practice prayer and thanksgiving!
Blessings and Namaste
OK so it's a little warm around here. 95 today.. yuk, yet I would not want anything bellow 40! Today is the day folks! Be sure to tune in this afternoon to Kathleen Brooks show Breaking the Conspiracy of Silence. Thank God someone is! I have the honor of being Kathleen's guest this afternoon and have to admit, I am a wee bit nervous. My interview on Planetary Spirit (Which is archived on their site mine) was only a little nerve wracking... The hosts are known to me, so I was a little more at ease.
While the site reports that my appearance on Global Internet Talk show is TBA, I have received word it will most likely be this Friday between 12-1pm EST. Kinda short notice to get my incredably wonderful and talented Web Master to change the info.. Such is the wonderful use of this "Blog".. what a weird name.. who thought of that anyway?
Both today Show and Friday will be archived on the sites. so if you miss um, you can get them anytime!
ON a "personal" note want to use this space to thank my Neighbor Rich, ppublically. He did not hesitate to help with a new and unbelievably heavy air conditioner last night.. Making 95 much easier to deal with today!
Thank YOU Rich... You ROCK!
In the meantime... Blessings and NAMASTE!
BIG Thank you to Kathleen Brooks for a great show today! Thank you for giving survivors a voice and vehicle to healing!!
Blessings Kathleen in all your work!
In the meantime... Blessings and Namaste
Stay tuned all!! I will be letting you know when the Global Talk Radio show will be aired, and later archived on the site. Had a great interview today and am told it will go up some time at the end of next week.
Happy Birthday today to my youngest! Major Party tomorrow as we celebrate him and his brother whos birthday is next week!
Busy times!! Too much cake! WE talk about my birthday (its in-between the boys') Shhh.. age is just a bunch of numbers right?
It has taken so long to grow up it seems and yet, I still feel I need to be a child. Wonder why!
The important thing is that this is a brand new day! In fact today is the day The Lord has made - lets rejoice and be glad in it!
And in the meantime -
Blessings and Namaste
Blessings.. I am always awed at the way God works! Feeling slightly down about yet another birthday I went with my children to a local restraunt. My kids were funny as the announced to anyone and everyone that it was my birthday (My youngest deciding to add the number of years I have existed on this planet!) As we finished our meal and the kid insisted we have dessert so the wait-staff could sing to me, our waitress leaned over.
"I have to tell you something" she said. " The couple that was in back of you... well the woman handed me a twenty dollar bill on the way out and asked that it go toward your bill! She said Happy Birthday." I turned to see where they had been as she added "They are gone now."
Thank you unknown person.. thank you God for bringing these gifts of Love my way on my Birthday. It is not the first time someone has "Payed it forward" for me. Once in line at a coffee/donut drive up I arrived at the window only to discover the woman in front of me had payed for my order. The staff at the window said " She said it was because you had been so nice and let her pull in front of you."
This is what Loving others is about. Yes, I have done this too.. randomly paying for the person in back of me.. I have a dear friend who routinely pays a highway toll for the person in back of him.
It is simply about Random acts of Kindnees... Have you ever done this?
In the Meantime.. Blessings and Namaste
My latest interview is up on GlobalTalkRadio!!!
It will air in our live stream on Thursday, July 5th at 11am ET (8am PT) and again at random times in the future. More importantly, the show can be streamed or downloaded on-demand 24/7 at:
http://www.globaltalkradio.com/shows/astorytotell
Be sure to check it out!!!
So here we are.. it is the seventh day in the seventh month of the seventh year of this millennium. 07/07/07.. feeling they urge to play those numbers?! I woke thinking about what luck really is. Dreams I had last night seemed to have something of "luck" attached to them... one was of escape and victory from forces that would harm while the other was a comparing and contrasting of material belongings with one I happen to know with a great deal more. I could not tell if in that dream I actually was longing for more or just taking a look at it. In this now moment I can say, while it is nice they have all those wonderful things, what I have is enough!
But is it luck? Or is it choice? Is it the longest straw or the longest held thought in mind.
What do you believe you deserve? It is one I have struggled with for so long. One of my mother's favorite words of control was about how "deserved" the bad things that happened, but about how deserved nothing else. I still have to remind myself that is NOT my truth.
I don't think there is such a thing as luck, I think it is about chosing to think differently. To stay in the possitive. Arguing our limitations will only bring more limitations. The universe will respond to whatever your thoughts put out. If thoughts of "I can't" I don't deserve" and "I don't have.." fill your mind, the unverse will respond to that. Its about choice.. not about luck.
SEVEN however, is a highly spiritual number. Its about completion. The story of the creation involves six day of work and a seventh to celebrate with rest the completion of the work. (Isn't it also interesting that 7/7/07 just happens to be on the seventh day!!) Seven is considered a holy number.It is the number of manifestation (back to "thoughts held in mind produce after their kind" - unity principle.) In a sense it represence totatality and some suggest perfection. The number seven more importantly is about completion. Perhaps on this seventh day of the week, on this seventh day of the seventh month in this seventh year we should take time in prayer to release to the universe all that no longer serves us.. and open to the gifts of Spirit.
In the meantime ..
Blessings and Namaste (X7!)
Do you trust God? I ask myself daily how much I trust that the Creator of all will and does indeed care for my every need. A concsiousness of prosperity is something I must constantly work at - and that I know is about Trust! However, when I do turn my attention to the knowing that God provides for all.. that which is outpictured in my life is amazing.
Recently several things happened with in a short time period which confirmed my inner knowing that God takes care of me. I was driving into a local breakfast drive thru to get my morning Java and something to eat at the very same time as another car. I stopped and let the woman go. As I arrived at the window.. money in hand I was told to keep it.. the woman I had let go in front of me, had paid for my breakfast as a thank you!! Then a week ago on my birthday my children and I ventured out to a local restraunt. My kids of course announcing to anyone and everyone that it was my birthday - my youngest adding the numerical age I had achieved! (oy) At the end of the meal as we were about to order the insisted upon dessert (so the crew could sing their song) the waitress leaned over and said: "I have to tell you something.. There was a couple sitting in back of you.." I immediatly thought.. ot oh, the kids were too loud and they complained.. however she went on "The woman handed me 20 dollars as they were on their way out the door and said to put toward your bill and say 'Happy Birthday." - wow - if that was not all enough I woke a few days ago, with that "financial fear" I sometimes go into. I was not pleased with my negative thinking and simply told God.. " I expect unexpected income today. I expect some sort of check in the mail." As I arrived home and checked the mail there was a check from my car insurance company for overpayment~! I can only say.. God is Good... ALL THE TIME
In the meantime - Blessings and Namaste
Going to Spirit for healing is as easy as closing your eyes, dropping consciously from your head to heart and KNOWING that you are One with the Creator of All... that you are an extention of the Divine Mind. It is about knowing that in the realm of pure potential, anything and everything is possible. It is about remembering that our Higher Self is whole and perfect, it has to be as we are created in the image and after the likeness of the Perfect Universal Consciousness - God. We are God's beloved Children in whom It is well pleased. There can be nothing but wholeness and perfection in that. Healing is about the recognition of all of that.. and more...
Yea easier said then done!
In the Meantime.. Blessings and Namaste
Ok we are off! Might be able to log on and let ya know who the vacation is going but then again.. who knows. we may be having like wayyyy tooo much fun.
So the kids and I are off to visit my life long and dear friend - my soul sister.. A cabin in the mountains, some hiking, swimming in clean lakes and a visit across the boarder to Canada! Woo Hoo... Blessings and Namaste all...
So what's a vacation without a little trip to the ER! It was only a short scare as the ER staff proclaimed my fear - my child's leg was "broken".. alas.. the X-ray, Thank you God, showed us otherwise! Badly bruised, yes, but not broken! Having gotten that crisis out of the way at the beginning of the trip we were ready to try to start to enjoy the rest of the trip. My kids had a great time and I had a chance to sit quietly on the porch of my friends Mountainside Log Cabin and observe, up close and personal, God. There, high above the rest of the world one can actually forget that the rest of the world exists. For a moment, you can forget there is a war raging, that hatred looms in city streets, that people and children are starving and dying in remote areas and that this world could be dying because of the way we have disrespected it. There on that mountain, with cleaner than other lakes below, and wild life all around - you can, for a moment, forget. So many times I sat quietly, taking in the panaramic landscape, watching a Hawk circle for prey just, it seemed a short distance above, sitting as still as possible as a humming bird whized up to the hummingbird feeder my friend had hung on her porch - exquisit as it zipped in and away. At night, the same sky that held clouds you could nearly touch displayed more stars than on could dream existed. One night in particular, my friend and I sat discussing it all and I meantioned how I knew at my depths that no matter what, God held us. A few moments later, my gasped and pointed straight ahead. Two clouds were coming together and we could not deny, they appeared as two hands, fingers extended from long narrow arms and hands - I sighed. "See. God is embrassing this world." And in that moment, you could believe, without reservation, that the hand of God was always at work for the greater good.
There, on that mountain, I remembered - intending that the moment of renewal would remain with me. And if, for a moment, I am caught up again in this world - I return in mind to the peace of that place - to the side of that mountain, see the hawk, see the hummingbird, see the hands of God encircling this globe.. For a moment...
Blessings and Namaste
Been doing a lot of sitting and taking it all in. The problem with doing that is finding that place of simple (or not so simple) acceptance of all as it is - because it is and not going to a place of judgement. Its not so much falling into the trap of calling something good or bad as it falling into a place of fear around something - alas.. fear it continues to seep in when I think I have gotten so much better at resisting it. FEAR- False Evidence Appearing Real. And I must constantly remind myself of that. Standing in Trust that all is well, That God is in charge and all is in Divine Order is without a doubt soo hard. Prayer and Meditation are the only ways I am able to step beyond the fear..
Hold me in your prayers as I walk through it one more time
Blessings and Namaste
Ya know.. overall I am consider myself an easy going person..I believe in our Freedom.. I believe in Freedom of speach and people doing whatever they want as long as others are NOT hurt in the process... if others are hurt, then it is no longer acceptable. IT OUTRAGES me that others do not consider the rights others around them. When I started this web site, I opened the forum to all who wanted to post thoughts.. it is pretty clear this site is in existance for those who have been abused - and/or those who worked people who have been abused. When postings started appearting that were only spammers who posted links to drug and porn sites.. I had to take steps to screen those who wanted to post. Now, within the last several days I have received an onslaught of emails.. ALL of which are from PIGS who are sending rude sexual comments and links again to porn.. this time they send it to ME.. It outrages me that there is no consideration for the fact that this is a site dedicated to the healing of sexual abuse.. and yet they are sending links to PORN!
My message today is to those people: I have no problem with you doing what you want.. if you are into porn and no one is getting hurt.. feel free.. but DO NOT send your porn to me or others who are not in a place to want or need to receive it. Have respect for others. Have respect for me.
Thank you
Blessing and Namaste
What if.. someone you love did something that was totally out of character.. something you never dreamed in a life time they would be capable of doing... But we are capable aren't we? Think of the parents of the Virg. Tech murderer. Did they ever once look at their son and believe for a second that he might out 33 lives including his own? For that matter, did he? Do we stand back and say no that didn't happen? It could not have happened because he is simply not capable of that? Well in this case we can not do that, there were too many witnesses. But what about when their are no witnesses? What about when someone crosses a line - for whatever reason; a psychotic episode, a burst of anger, too much alcohol and/or drugs, a "flash back" of their own - do we dismiss the one injured as a nut case making up lies simply because it is not our experience with that particular person they say has done something horrific? Do we say - "You lie" because we do not think it possible for the incident to have occured? It becomes harder when it is a member of our own family - the wife who discovers her husband has committed a horrible crime.. or a child who discovers their parent has acted in ways they never imagined possible. - Do we dismiss the accuser simply because it is not in our realm of possiblities that they may speak the truth? What if.. What if it IS their truth? When hearing it is too painful we easily dismiss it all as lies. Perhaps that is too is ok.
MOVE is a four letter word for a reason! OY! The last several weeks I have been focused on relocating my family. Though overwhelmed with the challenge of packing three kids, three cats and a puppy - and nearly everything we owned, I decided to approach it systematicly. I was determined to be more organized, clearly Lable boxes and where they would go in our new home and keep only those things we really needed or clearly had a sentimental value.. ugh..
I packed, I purged, tossed, I gave, I cleaned and coughed (dust ya know) I bubble wrapped, I taped boxes, I labeled, I stacked.. and as the move date drew closer I would often stand back, still overwhelmed by what was left to do!
Then the moving company from hell arrived two hours late, and the saga ended with me hiring a different company for the next day.. alas we would not arrive at our new destination on the date we had hoped to, but we would be in time for the children to start at their new schools as scheduled.
And so here I sit... Boxes.. still piled around me! (computer MUST be the first thing unpacked!) We are in our new home and LOVING it..
However as with every other time I have done this before - I swear.. I WILL NEVER MOVE AGAIN!
In the meantime.. Blessings and Namaste!
Happy Holidays Dear Ones!
There is no specific reason I have neglected to write other than the move, settling into our new home and new surroundings, getting the children settled into their new schools and the not so small task of UNpacking! Then suddenly the holiday maddness is was upon me! Not any good reasons, but reasons non the less.
We are settled now, I believe. My children are of course excited about Christmas (askig daily to just open presents now!)
I have taken time to reflect on all that has been given to me. I am blessed to have been able to thus far manage the task of parenting fatherless children though at times this single parenting job is overwhelming. It is overwhelming on so many levels, Financially and emotionally. They grieve their fathers death daily and each in her/his own unique way. Each must be met where they are and that is not always easy. The move has shifted some of this, but never will it be "all better."
While I am grateful for this I do grieve myself. Standing in one's truth can be a lonely and sometimes frightening experience. Hands extended out to replace the one's that have been removed are welcomed supports, but there is always a small void left when support is withdrawn. The sharp realization that someone is no more is that much more difficult when they have not left this planet. And so we begin a new, create new hopes, dreams, traditions and family.
I wish you each blessings of peace, hope, Love and Joy this Holiday Season. I wish you deep and Light-filled Healing. I wish the ability to embrace the world in Love and recognize the Christ essence in each and every person you meet.
And in the meantime... Blessings and Namaste
I have to pass on a cool new site you should check out. It was perhaps one of the safest and easiest ways to meet people on the Net! http://www.crushorflush.com is perfect for meeting new folks! I highly recommend ya give it a try!
Many Blessings
Christine
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